The dog piss crucifix stains the street
Marking the place that Rover will s(h)it
Straining over his yellow river
He defecates with a violent shiver
Oh I'm sorry is that he a she?
I only saw the stream of pee
My, what a sweet and charming pup
Goodness, you'll have to pick that up!
Why can't you see that your doggy's poo
Will stick to an unsuspecting shoe?
People will thank you and think it super
If you invested in a pooper scooper
Tell me why I fear being thumped
For remarking that your mutt has dumped?
Take the excrement from man's best friend
And flush it down your own U-bend!
Do you not somehow perceive it wrong
To cover the thoroughfare in bestial dung?
Is it the animal, or the owner, who
Is to blame for all this doggy-doo?
Pray wait sir, why do you walk on by
Now that your pet has made his pie?
Yes, grab your doggy's pile of cack
And put it in your plastic sack
Now surely you cannot think that right
Just to abandon your pooch's shite?
Leaving that stool all neatly wrapped
In the place that Fido crapped
I know I'm like a dog with bone
I feel it anti-social to have to moan
But who decreed that beasts all furred
Could coat the paths with sticky turd?
So - don't leave it there out in the street
All packaged up like some shiny treat
We all deserve clean paths to roam
Please take your canine faeces home!
Donald Keyman
