ToSumUp - Stephen A. Roberts

A tongue in cheek summary of the majority of online comments made about the purchase by the Guernsey Police of an Armour Plated, bullet proof Landrover costing £183,000 of Guernsey Taxpayers Money

ToSumUp - Stephen A. Roberts

Inspector Rice is in a paddy
He only wants to kill the baddie
Safe inside his Norman keep
He polishes his designer jeep
Ignoring questions from Gary B
About the force’s profligacy
He keenly reads his Daily Mail
Where’s that water cannon sale?

Yes, he’s waiting for that glorious day
When society’s fabric breaks away
And he can tool up and sanction murder
By the shock troops of his New Order
Ready to roll on this small rock
Are PC Heckler and PC Koch
With armoured cars and rubber bullets
They’ll erase the Bouet and les Genats

The nicest guys you’ll ever meet
Are Guernsey bobbies on the beat
But Ricey will lose the public trust
Sending his Panzers to a bust
A drunken spat, a few raised voices
Domestic grief the sniper’s choices
So Ricey, before you come a cropper
Trade the Landy for community coppers!

Stephen A. Roberts