I got a strange call from Track and Trace
Who said that I had been in some place
Where as far as they could reasonably tell
I'd brushed past someone with no sense of smell
I said that's lucky cos I usually whiff
Of creeping old age and a hint of Jif
I asked where and how, I pressed them too far
'Cos they decided to hide behind GDPR
"You'll need a test and will have to pay
Give us your bank details straight away"
Like Stroobs my ever-faithful cat
I began to smell a bloney big rat
I suggested they come tell me face to face
"We can't" they said, "we're Track and Trace
We don't want to be catching it too
We just need your secret PIN from you"
So I told them I hadn’t been past my gate
Since we were told to self isolate
For months I haven’t even been to Town
That was when they put the bloney receiver down!
As that nice Mr Peston says "let me be clear"
This bogus call could cost you dear
Don't be fooled into opening your purse
'Cos this cure for Corona will be much worse!
Joan Etoile
