Illusion Of Happiness - Tony Bradley

At 19, I actually thought that now, I’m happy,
especially after my torturous childhood,
because, suddenly, it seemed there was a purpose
fortuitously, suddenly, a convenient role.
I was her brave knight, in shining armour
for 30 years thus, thinking only of her,
But she suddenly died, and I realised that I’d been hiding
just too afraid to find my soul.

Suddenly bereaved, alone,I had to toughen up
my life was just empty, undone
I’d cowered behind an image, all those years
and denied myself a life of fun.

Tony Bradley