Envy - Oscar Milde

I don’t know why I envy him.
I think that he should envy me.
He may attend a fancy gym,
look GQ cool, write poetry,
play the guitar, be tall and slim,
and get in smart night-clubs for free,
but, to my mind, he’s really dim,
the fool behaves impulsively,
goes off to Paris on a whim
and never hints at taking me.
He thinks me dull, he calls me prim,
he’s puzzled by my secrecy.
I may be short and hardly trim
but I’m a billionaire, you see.

Oscar Milde

Dog Days - Richard Fleming

Days gallop by, months, years, so fast
that panic of a sort sets in:
you feel that all the dreams you had
have slipped away, it’s all too late,
so when the scent of what’s escaped
drifts on the wind, your nostrils twitch
and, disregarding all the rules,
you follow it in hot pursuit.
In consequence, lives are destroyed:
homes, futures, harmony and hearts.
Too late, for what you lost, you yearn.
Old dogs, new tricks? They never learn.

Richard Fleming

It's just a Flat Cap - Kriss Lee

It's just a flat cap
Seen on stages worldwide
worn with aplomb and pride
Rakishly clamped down
Atop a head of aging curls

It's just a flat cap
Worn by my Grandad
Saw action through two wars
Still on his head at the end
Went with him to the grave

It's just a flat cap
Worn by the conductor
On the southbound train
Sweat stains in the band
Smuts stuck to the peak

It's just a flat cap
Worn for such comic effect
Peak aimed skywards
Cockeyed angle on his head
Mr Grimsdale, yelled out loud

It's just a flat cap
But more than that
It's a symbol of hard graft
A metaphor for common man
A hat worn on all occasions

It's just a flat cap
I said as I left it on my head
But we're having Sex she said!
I reached for her and drew her close
OK she sighed, "You can leave your Cap on"

It's just a flat cap
Worn all day to keep me warm
But no matter where I go
At the end of the working day
Home is where I lay my Cap

It's just a flat cap
But famously on a workshy head
Provided much needed comedy
Lightening the days toils and woe
Trying all the time to hoodwink Flo

It's just a flat cap
With a peak and not a point
Nicely rounded to fit upon Oblio's head
But perfectly weighted too for flight
Allowing Oblio to win at Triangle Toss

It's just a flat cap
Hiding multi coloured hair
As I get older it might be more fair
If used it for another purpose too
In front of my ugly mug might be an idea

It's just a flat cap
It's something else too
If you're guilty of something bad
You insulted me, or maligned me
This is for you, try it on, if the Cap fits, wear it

Kriss Lee

Joy Rider - Diane Scantlebury

When I’ve got dementia
You’ll drive me around in your car,
I won’t have a clue where I am
Or who the hell you are,
It’ll be an adventure without memory
That’ll make me feel happy inside,
Tomorrow there’ll be no recollection
So for now I’ll enjoy the ride!

Diane Scantlebury

Jungle Fever - Bare Gyrls

In the jungle, dancing naked,
gorgeous lady, well-appointed.
She gyrates, cries Shake it! Shake it!
Wow, she must be double jointed.
Crouching in the jungle leafage,
I admire her wondrous cleavage.
She turns cartwheels, she’s amazing.
Swings from branches, does some high kicks.
She could sell me double-glazing,
win my heart and the Olympics
but it’s hopeless, don’t you see ...
Beauty’d scorn a beast like me.

Bare Gyrls