Operation Mincemeat - Stephen A. Roberts

Do you remember
The man who never was
An unnamed corpse
Turned volunteer for the cause

She met him on the subway
Sweetly they held hands
Before his final journey
To foreign lands

A considerate lover
A special friend
She imagined a different life
But it had to end

Floating in a foreign sea
He became alive
And by his dead embassy
Helped to fool the other side

Stephen A. Roberts

Image: Wikipedia

Track and Trace - Joan Etoile

I got a strange call from Track and Trace
Who said that I had been in some place
Where as far as they could reasonably tell
I'd brushed past someone with no sense of smell

I said that's lucky cos I usually whiff
Of creeping old age and a hint of Jif
I asked where and how, I pressed them too far
'Cos they decided to hide behind GDPR

"You'll need a test and will have to pay
Give us your bank details straight away"
Like Stroobs my ever-faithful cat
I began to smell a bloney big rat

I suggested they come tell me face to face
"We can't" they said, "we're Track and Trace
We don't want to be catching it too
We just need your secret PIN from you"

So I told them I hadn’t been past my gate
Since we were told to self isolate
For months I haven’t even been to Town
That was when they put the bloney receiver down!

As that nice Mr Peston says "let me be clear"
This bogus call could cost you dear
Don't be fooled into opening your purse
'Cos this cure for Corona will be much worse!

Joan Etoile

Non Discrimination - Diane Scantlebury

A virus knows no boundaries
It doesn’t recognize colour or race,
It cares not for wealth or status
A lethal enemy without a face,
A virus has simple requirements
To infiltrate, infect, replicate,
It has no respect for gender or age
It doesn’t discriminate,
Some think they’re invincible
They’ll distort and bend the rules,
They’ll gamble with the lives of others
They are chancers and inconsiderate fools,
In a crisis some thrive on hindsight
Always seeking someone else to blame,
They’re the reckless and the idiots
A virus can’t distinguish,
And will treat them all the same!

Diane Scantlebury

Pigeon Blues - Richard Fleming

Pity us poor pigeons, please,
forced to perch on roofs and trees
for the statues that we sat on
have been overturned and spat on.
All those worthies of the ages
have now been encased in cages
lest the mobs, now judge and jury,
desecrate them in their fury.
Statues are a pigeon’s toilet:
put one up, we’re sure to soil it
with a coat of guano splatter.
Bring them back, don’t pigeons matter?

Richard Fleming

I Wish I Was Winnie the Pooh - Tony Gardner

I sometimes wish I was Winnie The Pooh
Rambling Five Acre Wood all day
I'd have no money, but lots of Honey
And plenty of time to play
No going to work or Income Tax
No teachers or going to School
Just dawdling around on Pooh-Stick Bridge
With Piglet and Eeyore the mule.
Of pots of 'hunny', I'd never be short
So it's often you'll hear me say
"Oh, don't I wish I was Winnie The Pooh
Rambling Five Acre Wood all day".

Tony Gardner